ISBN: 0310219396
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Avg Cusomer Rating: 5
Reviews:
Summary: Profound---At Times Overwhelmingly Thought Provoking
I am a woman. I'm only on page 90-something, but I find this book to be profound. My personal experience tells me that men ARE too passive. Their silence is K I L L I N G their marriages, their children, and MEN's own spirits!! This is not meant to be judgmental, it is just my deep experience!!
My feelings as I read this book ranged from a feeling of awe as I recognized the truth of what Dr. Crabb wrote, to feeling like I wanted to weep and wail in despair as I recalled the pain consequences resulting from the silences of the men in my own life. At times I literally had to close the book and lay down and just ponder what I'd just read. At other times, my soul Y E A R N E D to hear the voice of men begin to break the codes of silence around the world that is permitting evil to exist and grow!
Dr. Crabb not only gave a penetrating analysis of what happened in Genesis, but his examples from other parts of the Bible seem to make amazing sense and seem to reveal UNCOMMON insight into the silence of other men in the Bible. One of the co-authors, Don Hudson, is a professor teaches Hebrew at Western Seminary in Seattle, Washington. I can't imagine Professor Hudson would knowingly let Dr. Crabb come up with a wrong interpretation just to sell the book!!!
From reading this book, I've come to believe that men A R E indeed to speak into situations like God did!!! I see it all so much more clearly now!!! Now that I see these behaviors of the characters who remained silent, I cannot not see!! Once you know the truth, you can't unknow it!! How do you explain these silences!! If you have a better insight, please tell us!!!
I haven't finished the book yet, but I believe that Dr. Crabb is going to indicate that while a man may not always know what to do or say, he should AT THE VERY LEAST SPEAK TO GOD about the situation and not be silent or passive!
I wish that every pastor in America would read this book and would do some heavy preaching on it. I hope that more men will read this book and review it.
The Bible does NOT record that Eve SPOKE to Adam, but that she GAVE him to eat. Heeding the voice of your wife," was the translation. I wonder what the original Hebrew said? Now T H A T would be worth investigating!!!
I believe we can infer that she at least HANDED him the piece of fruit. When she handed him the piece of fruit, why did he not REFUSE it? He at least could have DONE something, like knock the fruit out of her hand. At some point he would have NEEDED to SAY or DO SOMETHING!!! Why did he NOT do this?
I am single, but if I had a husband, I would EXPECT him to say something if I was about to do something wrong. I may have a free will, but as my leader, he has the AUTHORITY and OBLIGATION to tell me he thinks I'm going in the wrong direction. Likewise the wife, also has the authority to voice her concerns. She cannot force her husband to do right, but she certainly SHOULD speak up. It's a two way-street. Each spouse regularly needs the feedback and input of the other. That's just one one of the many unique dimensions of marriage.
I don't sense that the authors are bashing men. They are just rare individuals, who had the courage to SEE and REVEAL what they have seen!!
If I could afford to, I'd buy this book for every man I've ever known and give a copy to every man I'll ever meet in the future.
This book is a rare gem, and sadly it will probably go largely unread and unappreciated. I applaud all the authors for their UNCOMMON courage to be so transparent and BREAK the SILENCE! May God bless them, and may this book help to change the lives of everyone who reads it and those that they love!!
Summary: Great book. A must for any mature man
Larry Crabb and his associates describe parts of how they were raised and lived. By example they discovered the world's way of being a man, the wrong way. As they discover the real meaning of being tough and in control, their lives taka a change.
Starts a little slow, but the wait is worth it. In depth, insightful and a marvelous guide for any man and especially one who wants to fulfill his calling.
Summary: "...because you harkened unto your wife".
Is the typical male a non-communicating oblivious dolt? Do we men grunt and make bodily noises as proof of this? Would men rather sit around and do nothing? Do we care about nothing but ourselves?
I think not, and history bears out the true nature of man; he wants to make life better for all of us, men and women. Larry Crabb has done nothing but make men out to be the "fall" guy for relationship ills. This "interpretation" of the true biblical story of Adam, Eve, and the fall, is a dangerous addition to the myth of man as the blubbering fool ideology in our world today. Why Crabb ignores the free will, and personal choice, that our "parents" both enjoyed, is beyond me. Eve had a choice and Adam had no responsibility to either stop her, lord over her, or to prevent her from doing anything. She knew the rule God had told Adam, and that was enough. The serpent even questioned her, and she responded that she did know what God told Adam. To say that Adam should have stopped her is total fabrication. As one reviewer mirrored, God did not judge Adam because he didn't step into the chaos, God's own words in Genesis 3:17 were, "...because you harkened unto your wife". Get it straight Mr. Crabb, God spoke and you ignore His words! Crabb's assertion is ludicrous. He takes nothing and builds a case from it.
What this book does is add to the idea that man is a fool. It places women above men and is fuel to the fire that is burning over all the earth; women are taking the upper hand and adding to the damage Eve alone is responsible for initiating. Today, women are continuing the destruction of marriage, nee relationship, through birth control, so called abortion "rights", using the power of their careers to divorce their spouses at an unprecedented rate, and through psychological distortions such as saying any man who gets angry, or ever yells, is an abuser and should be gotten rid of and needs therapy or drugs.
If you look at the bible and check Genesis 3:6, Eve made her choice because it made her look good, it would leave a good taste in her mouth, and she would look wise; this doesn't sound like a person unable to make a choice. It is a narcissistic perspective. It doesn't sound like Adam was supposed to butt in. Adam was innocent, until he CHOSE to eat the fruit at Eve's urging. Why should Adam have doubted the beautiful creature God gave him? Women have inherited the predisposition Eve had; to be superior in men's eyes, as women today are doing. God made us equal. Our sin is equal in every way, but our behavior is not. Women were, and are, still deceived. This deception has become the norm, and men are paying the price for it. More women today make more money than men than at any time in history. There are more women in power positions than ever; we may see a woman president in our lifetime. Women today; don't want to have natural childbirth and suffer the pain God told them they would have as evidenced by the rise in C-Sections, don't want to raise their own children by using nannies, and would rather work than be a mother and wife at home because it is "embarrassing" to be a "stay at home mom". These societal ills and more are all fallout of Eve's sin. To say that men, as Crabb asserts, can change the world through intervention in the chaos is absurd. The path was set in the Garden, and women are ruling the roost, in contradiction to God's judgment of Eve in Genesis 3:16,"...and he will rule over you". Well my fellow earthlings, our country has let the revolt against God's command, and women are in charge. Eve tried to show superiority to not only God, but Adam as well. Adam's sin was to disobey God, but not for the same reasons Eve ate. Adam was seduced by Eve, and ate the fruit; Eve simply continued the deception of the Serpent. Today, women do not want equality, they want to control it all, and their choices are as damaging as Eve's was in the Garden.
Women today also demand that men be like them; that is absurd! Crabb has bought into this psychology of a "feminized" man. Dr. Dobson discusses this in "Bringing up Boys". We were built differently than women, and always will be. The job of being a relationship warrior belongs to women! That is what the word "helpmeet" means. Women are supposed to be above the chaos and be there for their man, and not only did Eve fail, but women are failing miserably today at the role God created them for. Eve created the chaos, and her daughters are following in her steps. Men cannot reverse that. Yes men need to be more proactive, but from what we all have seen, when men try to step into the chaos of relationships, they are chastised as being controlling and manipulative by women. Sorry Mr. Crabb, you have it in reverse, women need to stop creating chaos and be what God created them for, a warrior of relationship.
I recommend women, and men, read a realistic view of men in a book by Shaunti Feldhahn of Atlanta, called "for women only; what you need to know about the inner lives of men". She has it right. Thank God that Mrs. Feldhahn sees men for what they are; not the myths most women, and Larry Crabb, assert are true.
As a Christian man, I refuse to believe the lies perpetrated on men by writers, who I am certain have issues from their past including guilt and shame, telling us men we are fools and not willing to "step into the chaos". If this were so, how did we get the advances in our world scientifically, or even the development of our own country. The founding fathers of this country stepped into the chaos of England to come here to find freedom. Most relationship books are written by men. How could that be so if men did not want to face the chaos? Not only is this notion of a failure to step into the chaos not biblical, but it is damaging to all men who I know in my heart, do not want chaos in their relationships. God tells us to "stand firm" in His Truth. He repeatedly tells us He will deal with the chaos in His Word. It is not our job to step into the chaos, but to stand firm in faith, trusting God to deal with the chaos. Only God can make order of the chaos. We men are to simply walk in that faith. Women need to do the same and quit trying to force their narcissistic ways of Genesis 3:6 upon the world.
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